Monday

August 1, 2011

President Obama announced last night that congressional leaders have agreed on a deal to raise the country's debt ceiling, saving the U.S. from a potentially catastrophic lowering of its credit rating. By the way, that sound you hear is 1,000,000,000 Chinese people giggling.

A new doll called the Breast Milk Baby, which lets children simulate breast feeding with a doll and a special halter top, will soon be available in the United States. Finally—a toy that lets kids feel superior to their friends that use fake formula.

A drunk father in Louisiana was arrested last week after letting his eight-year-old son drive his pickup truck while he took a nap. Or, as it is known in Texas, "not news."

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