Thursday

July 28, 2011

Dunkin' Brands, the owner of Dunkin' Donuts and Baskin-Robbins, saw its stock price surge nearly 50% yesterday in its first day of public trading, perfectly mimicking the effect the company's food has on its eaters' waistlines.

Jeopardy host Alex Trebek ruptured his Achilles tendon while chasing a burglar in his hotel Wednesday. I'm sorry: What is "Jeopardy host Alex Trebek ruptured his Achilles tendon while chasing a burglar in his hotel Wednesday."

Continental Airlines was forced to cancel 24 flights yesterday when a number of its pilots called in sick. Industry experts said the calls were likely a coordinated effort on behalf of the pilots' union, although they would not rule out the fact that "Two and a Half Men" is currently the in-flight entertainment on all Westbound flights.

Scientists in South Korea announced yesterday they have created a glowing dog, presumably so it will be easier to spot when buried under a pile of rice. Also, just to recap, the scoreboard for Science currently reads: Glowing dog 1, Cure for Cancer 0.

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