May 3, 2011

Donald Trump congratulated President Obama yesterday for ordering the mission the killed Osama Bin Laden, adding "We should spend the next several days not debating party politics..." Said Obama, "Nah, I'm cool taking the credit on this one."

Canada had elections yesterday, which is hilarious.

The Texas state legislature is considering a bill that would make it a felony for an officer or agent to touch someone's private areas without "probably cause"—a move aimed at combating the TSA's new pat-down security procedures. If passed, the bill is expected to lead to at least one utterance of the phrase, "Yeah, you've given me probable cause...for sexy."

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