April 4, 2011

A new study shows that regular exercise can preserve and build heart muscles. But it also wastes valuable sweat that could otherwise be used while trying to talk to women, so I'd say it's still a give-and-take.

A new GOP budget proposal for 2012 that would make more than $4 trillion in cuts over the next 10 years has drawn criticism from Democrats for sparing the Pentagon from any reductions. Although, to be fair, the Pentagon is the only government department that could bomb the shit out of you if it gets angry, so maybe we should just leave those guys alone...

Miley Cyrus won Favorite Movie Actress at this year's Nickelodeon Kids' Choice Awards for her performance in "The Last Song," proving once and for all that kids have terrible taste in movie actresses.

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