China will soon ban smoking in hotels, restaurants and other indoor public spaces in an effort to curb the habit in the cigarette-loving nation. Boy, it's good to see that government has finally got its priorities straight.
Archaeologists have discovered the remains of a saber-toothed vegetarian in Brazil, which is odd because I could have sworn I saw them performing last week at South by Southwest.
A new report this week estimates the U.S. medical marijuana market at $1.7 billion a year. Dude, do you realize with $1.7 billion, you could buy 8 billion Pop Tarts? Man, I could go for a Pop Tart. Do you guys like Pop Tarts? Hey guys, what's your favorite Pop Tart? Guys, guys, guys: What's your favorite Pop Tart? I like Strawberry Pop Tarts. Those are my favorite Pop Tarts. Mmm...Pop Tarts.