February 9, 2011

Billionaire Facebook overlord Mark Zuckerberg has obtained a restraining order against a man who has allegedly been stalking him. Or, to hear the stalker tell it, "It's Complicated."

In an interview, first lady Michelle Obama said her husband has quit smoking. "Oh, please," replied Sarah Palin, "anyone can quit smoking. Try quitting being governor."

The iPad II is reportedly in production, so start hating yourself, guy who just bought a new iPad.

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